Past writings

June 14, 2012

I was sitting in the shower, legs out touching the edge, and I was looking at all the bruises and scars on my legs. I thought to myself I could be one of those girls on tumblr that takes pictures of their  multi-colored legs, since i have bruises that haven’t left in years, scars from my clumsiness, and bug bites. I began looking from my knees to my stomach while slowly sliding down onto my back. I saw my dark blue veins, my white naval ring, and the freckle that is directly in the middle of upper body. I was still slowly moving down and still slowly examining my body parts. I noticed my arms were not only the most freckled area but also the tannest part of my body. I noticed the bug bites and scratches on my forearms and bruises on my elbows. Finally, laying all the way on my back i saw how noticeable the veins were on my breasts and the faint tan line from a couple of weeks ago. Looking directly below my chin I saw more bug bites and more scratches I have inflected upon the bites. I must have stayed out longer than I thought the other night, because there are certainly a lot of bites. I looked up because I was finished examining and I let the water fall upon my open eyes. I closed my eyes and slipped away into my world. 

I am in my world where the sky is filled with pink, purple, and orange clouds. There is no sun but there is a never ending light and comfortable warmth. Sometimes through the clouds you can see other galaxies and shooting stars. I am floating in crystal blue still sea of pure water. There are no fish, whales, seaweed, and no bottom. I wear only my skin and my hair is as long as it use to be and a little more curly. There is some land but it is miles away. I am finally at peace. I may not always be at peace, but in this moment I have seen my worst and best side and was able to balance them into purity. 

I open my eyes, waking back to this world, but still carrying the peace I felt when I was in mine. 

love always,

Alayna